Donald Trump Jr.’s recent “smoking gun” controversy of releasing the email correspondence between himself and an alleged Russian government agent, an act that seems akin to admitting personal guilt of overt Russian collusion (and possibly treason), has turned the political world on its head.
The Trump Administration is reportedly in crisis mode—though, in reality, the entire six-month presidency has been one long succession of crises—but reportedly Fox News is struggling with the news as well.
“This is very bad,” said one Fox News executive who requested anonymity to discuss the inner turmoil at Fox’s headquarters. “We’ve been saying all along that the Russian collusion business was a big liberal conspiracy designed to distract from Democrat’s big loss in 2016, but the drip, drip, drip of new evidence pointing to political fraud just won’t end.”
The Fox News boardroom has been struggling to figure out how to spin Donald Jr.’s apparent admission of guilt as positive for the Trump Administration.
“There’s just no way to obfuscate this,” said the executive. “And Fox News is great with conspiracies. We artistically developed conspiracies into a post-modern art form—the terrorist fist jab, birtherism, death panels, Benghazi, I could go on and on. We are conspiracy kings, but, unfortunately, it is pretty obvious at this point that Russiagate is definitively not a liberal conspiracy.”
Most upset, however, is Sean Hannity.
“Sean is a wreck,” said the executive. “Sean’s been pulling for the Trump family more than anyone else, and Sean has made several $5 million bets with liberal industry colleagues on Twitter that Trump is innocent of all allegations. Needless to say, Sean is very distraught now.”
Fox News executives have in recent weeks instructed on-air personalities to change their talking points from “There is no collusion” to “Collusion is not a crime,” but this has encouraged strong pushback from legal experts who maintain that collusion with foreign entities is, unambiguously, illegal.
(Photo courtesy of Gage Skidmore.)