Dallas, Texas—
Alex Jones, on his shitty radio show, today claimed that Donald Trump’s entire presidential campaign, electoral victory, and year-old presidency were all one giant liberal hoax intended to make conservatives look bad.
“This is the biggest, most epic false flag operation ever perpetrated against the United States of America. This is a giant hoax put on by Hillary Rodham Clinton and Barack Hussein Obama, all to make good, American patriots look stupid and feel bad about conservatism and libertarianism,” Jones said. “The fact of the matter is that Donald Trump doesn’t exist, and has never existed. This plot to make conservatives look morally bankrupt for electing him has been going on since 1946, when Trump was supposedly born. It sounds crazy, but I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life. And I’ve looked, ladies and gentlemen: there is literally no birth certificate for Donald Trump on record in any state, and there are no records that he ever existed prior to 2015. It sounds crazy, but I swear it’s true. Have I ever said anything untrue? Have I ever said anything that sounded batshit insane? Of course not. Donald Trump does not exist. Again, I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life. I’m more sure that Trump is a hoax than I am sure that Hillary Clinton is training an army of homosexual frogs to overtake American democracy beginning in the murky swamps of Louisiana—and I’ve seen the army of gay frogs! And if you look at photos of President Trump, it’s obvious that the guy you’re looking at is actually several different actors. Probably just Hillary and Obama wearing white male masks and making us conservatives look gullible.”
It was a flippant remark, and then Alex Jones switched topics to his apocalyptic survivalist products, this time highlighting a barrel of baked beans that supposedly will feed a family of 6 for three months and is sold on his website for only $49 plus shipping.
(Photo courtesy of Sean P. Anderson.)
The Halfway Post 
2 thoughts