Trump Protesters Are Dressing Up As The Grim Reaper

Photo (cropped) by Haberdoedas on Unsplash

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Protesters have started following Donald Trump around at his public events and golf courses dressed as the Grim Reaper and Satan.
Chinese state media hosts burst out laughing for 26 seconds on live TV when they found out Trump’s tariffs were ruled illegal.
Foreign governments have reportedly stopped negotiating with the Trump Administration over tariffs because they’re waiting for him to die.
Trump is reportedly starting to worry China won’t back down due to his tariff threats, and he’ll have to keep postponing his tariffs for the next three years.
A confused Eric Trump reportedly asked Don Jr. if their dad died, and JD Vance became president, if Vance would then become their father.
RFK Jr. is reportedly doing gain of function research on brain worms.
MAGA fans say Trump’s purple hands, slurred speech, cankles, conspicuous dementia, and his inability to walk in a straight line aren’t real, but are a 4-dimensional chess move to own the libs and the Deep State.
White House staffers say JD Vance keeps making comments that seem to imply he knows he will be president soon.
There’s a new reality show being developed called “Republican City” that will have contestants live for a year in a town where everyone is armed, there’s no minimum wage or healthcare, pollution and child labor are allowed, and women’s rights revert to the 1850s.
A local Trump voter just noticed that Trump hasn’t talked as much about dating Ivanka as he did before she became an adult.
Kim Jong Un says Trump’s cabinet meetings are even cringier than his because Trump’s sycophants grovel at his feet without the threat of certain death like Kim’s cabinet faces.
Trump is desperately trying to gerrymander America so he can get enough MAGA members of Congress to block the release of the Epstein files. [This isn’t a joke, it’s just true.]
Republicans who constantly pray for school shootings to stop, which never happens, are now praying for Trump to not die.
Local MAGA fans are worried the Deep State will replace Trump with a liberal shapeshifting demon disguised as Trump.
Several televangelists are demanding liberals stop praying for Trump to have a heart attack.
Local MAGA fans are uncomfortably acknowledging that Trump hasn’t talked about dating Ivanka since she turned 30.
Trump says people are saying he should sign the Declaration of Independence because he has done more for America than all of the Founders put together.
Trump is reportedly furious his allegedly impending death is resulting in so many viral posts on social media.
Liquor stores in blue cities are reporting record sales amid news that Trump’s health is failing fast.
Stephen Miller is reportedly concerned that if Trump dies his political career will be over.
Hillary Clinton and Kamala Harris are reportedly going to buy out a bar in D.C. and co-host a party to celebrate with free drinks for everyone who attends when Trump dies.
Trump wants to know what he did or said that has made so many people happy to hear rumors that he died. 🥃

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