Susan Collins Just Eviscerated Donald Trump In A Wild, Profanity-Laced Rant

(Picture courtesy of Gage Skidmore.)

Maine Senator Susan Collins today rhetorically took her gloves off and told America what she REALLY thinks of President Donald Trump:

“I’ve been waiting to say this for so long,” said Collins to The Halfway Post, “and now that I won reelection and Trump did not, I want everyone to know that I’m not afraid of that dumb b**** fat orangutan idiot, or his fishbowl-brained supporters who apparently love fascism and con man delusions more than democracy. F*** the fascists! F*** Trump! I voted for Biden! Because President Trump is a toddler-brained f**kwit c*** who turns even the most mundane and ceremonially easy parts of his job as POTUS into clusterf***s of dumbf*** a**holery! Every day he disgraces forever the historical prestige and honor of America with his orange-stained, ugly clown face and weasel hairdo. President Trump is the taint of US presidents! The frothy taint littered with dingleberries he hasn’t washed for four years as the stench has wafted out of his rapey, moron, reading-hating Oval Office and descended upon all of America making every US citizen’s life shittier, smellier, and more disturbed every day he has remained in office! And he’s the biggest p**** president we’ve ever had! No one should ever forget what a p**** he has been when it comes to standing up for American values around the world. He’s Putin’s little b****! I wouldn’t be surprised if he spends his six scheduled ‘Executive Hours’ every day grabbing himself by his butt p**** since he has no chance anymore with any suburban women who hate his guts and think of him as a gross pig rolling around in s*** slop! Honestly, F*** Donald Trump! I’m so glad he lost. Relieved even. I am ecstatic that monkey-brained lunatic now has to go back to regular life where he will be sued, indicted, prosecuted, and harassed by claims collectors for the rest of his miserable f***ing wretch life! Donald Trump is the biggest piece of s*** human being who ever lived! And so stupid! He thinks he’s so good at deals, but what deals did he make? Did he make Mexico pay for the wall? Did he win his trade war against China? Did he get an infrastructure deal? It still amazes me every individual day how incredibly, wildly, preposterously stupid he is! I wake up every morning thinking I’ve seen the stupidest logic ever thought up in his tweets, and then he tweets something even dumber! He’s the biggest dumbf*** I have ever encountered in my life. He’s the biggest dumbf*** I have ever heard of! He’s the biggest dumbf*** in human history! I hope the Southern District of New York f***s him so hard he spends the rest of his miserable dumbf*** life in prison with his dumbf*** fake hair falling out, his dumbf*** fake teeth falling out, his dumbf*** kids going to prison, too, and his dumbf*** name in the history books forever being followed with an asterisk leading to a footnote spelling out to every elementary schooler in history class from now until the sun explodes and melts the Earth and our entire solar system that Donald J. Trump is the biggest f***ing dumbf*** organism to ever metabolically exist! …Wow, I, uh, really got carried away there didn’t I?”

More from The Halfway Post vault:

Follow The Halfway Post, America’s #1 source of satirical news, on Facebook here, Twitter here, Tumblr here, or Instagram here for more liberal comedy, political humor and satire! Also, check out our podcast Brain Milk here!

One thought

  1. Maine Republican Senator Susan Collins clutching her pearls while hurling Fuck Yous at her friends and neighbors, a little side note of humor to lighten up that Thanksgiving turkey…bwahaha

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.