Help me make fun of the fascists all day long. Become a paid subscriber to support me for just $2.50 a month.
- Hungarian media outlets are calling JD Vance’s political appearance in Budapest “the biggest political flop” in their nation’s history because the Trump Administration’s enthusiastic support has wrecked Viktor Orban’s poll numbers.
- Donald Trump reportedly failed his dementia test today at Walter Reed after he confused his doctors with the Iranian negotiators he keeps claiming he’s talking to.
- Prediction markets are betting on whether Trump went to Walter Reed Hospital because of a stroke, heart attack, or a prolapsed rectum from shitting himself.
- Protesters in Hungary reportedly left dozens of couches filled with condoms on the sidewalks all around the Budapest hotel JD Vance is staying at while campaigning for Viktor Orbán with a giant sign that says, “Welcome to Budapest, Couch F*cker!”
- The homophobic Texas televangelist who claimed Iran would surrender on Easter and name Donald Trump as their new Ayatollah so he could convert all of Iran to Christianity accidentally emailed his entire congregation his Grindr account in his Easter morning e-card.
- A big banner at the Mar-a-Lago Easter brunch says “Happy birthday, Jesus!”
- Trump reportedly just told an audience of Evangelicals at the White House Easter egg hunt that the war in Iran was inspired by his favorite Bible stories of when Jesus defeated the Minotaur, the Cyclops, and Medusa.
- The Hungarian Association of Banjo Players protested JD Vance when he arrived to campaign for Viktor Orbán by playing the “Dueling Banjos” song from the movie Deliverance through electric amplifiers outside his hotel each morning starting at 5am.
- Pete Hegseth is reportedly worried he and the military were used like pawns to help distract from the Epstein Files.
- A new poll in Hungary found that JD Vance’s visit to Budapest made Viktor Orbán’s party lose 3% of its support.
- JD Vance’s Hungary trip was reportedly derailed by Trump’s threats of historic war crimes against Iran because he knows his presidential chances in 2028 are now zero.
- Mike Johnson reportedly asked his staffers if Trump nukes Iran how many days they think he can get away with telling the media he hasn’t heard or seen the news about it yet.
- JD Vance is reportedly worrying liberals might be right about Trump being owned by Putin after sitting in on several briefings about Russia giving Iran intelligence on the coordinates of US bases to bomb and watching Trump refuse to say or do anything about it.
- Become a paid subscriber and support my comedy for just $2.50 a month. 🥃
☕️ Or buy me a coffee if you want to help keep me caffeinated.
If you think Donald Trump is a joke, I published three books for you: Satire In The Trump Years, Satire In The Biden Years, and Trump Comedy. Request your local library order a copy.
I’ve also published four existentialist poetry books, Cabaret No Stare, Moon Goon, Hotel Golden Hours, and Nostradoofus.
Our social media platforms are getting scrambled by oligarchs so if you like my writing, diversify where you follow me so you never miss my jokes to interrupt your doomscrolling: Threads, Twitter, Bluesky, Facebook, Instagram, Spoutible, Medium, and Substack.
The Halfway Post 