Pelosi Says She’ll Pass A New Article Of Impeachment Each Week Until Trump Resigns

Washington D.C.—

According to several Democratic staffers, Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi has agreed to a new House impeachment strategy of releasing one new article of impeachment against President Donald Trump each week for as many weeks as it takes Mr. Trump to resign.

A staffer on the House Democratic leadership team anonymously supplied an audio tape of Mrs. Pelosi explaining the strategy.

The following are her words:

“We’ve got Donald Trump by his tiny, shriveled up balls. Mitch McConnell can’t fuck with me! He wants to play games with the Senate trial, that’s fine, we’ll pass a new article of impeachment each week, and make McConnell have to spend every hour of every day in ceaseless Trump impeachment trials. They’ll never get to confirm another unqualified, idiot conservative federal judge again. And, meanwhile, we’ll bombard Pompeo, Bolton, Giuliani and McGahn’s brains out with lawsuits and subpoenas until they cry and come begging to me to make all the litigation stop. They’ll squeal against Trump till the cows come home, and I cannot wait to watch the President’s tiny little sausage fingers smear the tears in his eyes all over his ridiculous orange face as he realizes he’s totally fucked while the sting of tanning lotion burns his retinas. Boys, we’re gonna grab the President by his pussy because when I, Nancy Pelosi, am Speaker of the House, I’ll do whatever the fuck I want to that man-baby whiny little bitch!”

You go, girl.

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(Picture courtesy of Gage Skidmore.)

32 thoughts

  1. This is a critically sad dangerous time in the History of the American Presidency! If the $80 million bounty placed on Trump is true, Nancy better do her job and expedite these proceedings. STOP playing around with innocent Americans lives! There has to be SOMEONE who can take charge of Congressional responsibility!

    1. Trump might not know how to talk to ppl. Mught get under ppls skin. Call you out your name. But we did not elect him to watch his tongue. We elected him to run a country , which he is foing a good job at that. Instead of trying to impeach, should be trying to resolve issues we have. Democrats so bitter that they criticize every movement he does. Get over it. He is every American’s president.

        1. You would never understand so why waste our time but the American people know and we will vote for him again. He’s the best of any president that we have ever had. He could get more done if he had a little help but he has God and all the Americans on his side so feel sorry for you all that can’t see that and want the worst for our country. I love my freedom. Don’t you??

        2. Emiko, you write like you’re retarded, but let me help you out with an answer. Trump pulled us out of the Paris Climate Accord for one thing. He’s removed many, many regulations that made it practically impossible to do business, which super charged our economy. Additionally, he got us out of NAFTA and renegotiated our trade relationships with Mexico and Canada. He’s helped our veterans, he’s working on legislation to get the opioid crisis under control. He signed a bill allowing critically ill people to seek new treatments for end-of-life diseases. Shall I go on? You know, there’s ample information on the internet as to what Trump has done. And yet you are here asking other people to tell you what he’s done. Just do a Google search, you lazy bastard.

          1. Kill me now, You are absolutely right!!!! Our economy is booming and our unemployment rate is at a record low!!!! He is doing a wonderful job as President.

      1. No we will not give over nothing that this FOOL does the United States of America is BETTER than this. Now he has to Go. The FOOLS that said get over it why not America.


      3. Nope he’s Russia’s puppet not my president not the majority of Americans president but the poorly educated and the Russians president

        1. If you can’t use punctuation correctly (or at all) and you’re still talking about Russians, you’re not that well educated.

  2. Trump ain’t doing a dam thing for this country. If he want to do something send them two idiots sons of his in the military and to Iraq.

    1. Take a hike Jamal asshole!! Where you from anyway boy?well you don’t sound like your from around here, so go back to whatever hole you crawled out of afreaka!!!

  3. Emiko is a bully, he bullys us, his wife and probably kicks his neighbor’s dog around!
    Emiko I know what kind of country I want my great grandchildren to grow up in and it s not yours!
    Please go back under the rotten cabbage leaf you crawled out of pleass!
    Dah dah Emiko you re a bully!
    Pelosi has done terrible things, she s being told what to do and how to do it and if she dont get Trump out of office ed all her shit going to be out there and she ll be in big trouble with all the ppl. So she s scrambling to try to do as the ppl holding things over head are telling her to do!
    That s all folks, good evening,!

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