Democrats in the House of Representatives just passed a budgetary bill ending the White House’s access to cable television.
“The House of Representatives is in charge of the government’s monetary expenditures, and we’ve decided it is long past the point at which it makes fiscal sense for taxpayers to subsidize President Donald Trump’s cable news obsession while he indulges himself in masturbatory democracy subterfuge hyping up nonsense conspiracy theories about voter fraud,” explained Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi. “We are willing to resume payments for the White House’s cable bills once the President acts like a big boy, admits he lost the election, and calls President-Elect Biden to concede like an adult worthy of the office he currently holds. Until the President acts his age, the House of Representatives has voted to ground him in the Oval Office without TV privileges.”
At noon today when the cable service was disconnected, loud shrikes were heard by dozens of tourists outside the White House.
President Trump then apparently spent the rest of the day on Twitter alternating between threatening Speaker Pelosi and begging her to let him have the cable back on in time to catch Sean Hannity’s show.
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