Donald Trump Claims Jared Kushner Is “Just A Coffee Boy”

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Washington D.C.—

President Donald Trump, in an apparent attempt to distance himself from his son-in-law and senior-level advisor Jared Kushner, described Kushner as a “coffee boy.”

Kushner is increasingly connected to the burgeoning RussiaGate scandal, and the FBI’s indictment and prosecution of Paul Manafort will likely incriminate Kushner.

With this in mind, it is not surprising that Mr. Trump would attempt to minimize Kushner’s importance throughout his Presidency in the minds of Americans.

“Kushner—who, many of you don’t know this, but he is my son-in-law—he really didn’t play any major role for me,” Trump said in a press conference following the Republican unveiling of the GOP’s tax reform bill. “Probably the major role Kushner fulfilled for the administration was as an errand boy. During meetings sometimes I would send him out of the office for coffee for me and Ivanka, and all the lawyers, and he’d take the elevator down to the lobby, grab his bicycle and pedal his way to a Starbucks, and then he’d get the order to go and secure the tray of cups on the back of bike and pedal back and come bring us the coffees. Ivanka thought it was cute that he’d come back all heavy breathing and a little sweaty in his tight suit. He is pretty I’ll give him that. Jared’s soft and not tough, but he’s pretty. Anyway, sometimes Jared would organize the food catering during public and private White House events. I think I saw him doing some gardening work a couple times. But yeah, he definitely did not have anything to do with Russia. I know for a fact he doesn’t speak Russia [sic], so what would he say to them if he ever even called them. You know what I mean? You know, the media is just such trash. They’ll lie about anything, won’t they? They’ll even lie about my errand boy Jared. Great kid. But, like I said, I barely know him.”

(Photo courtesy of The White House.)

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