Republicans Don’t Seem To Like When You Remind Them They Cheated For Every Branch Of Their Illegitimate Government


St. Louis, MO—

Local Republicans have felt stung by casual reminders that the Republican Party literally stole every branch of the government they wholly control by cheating to win the Presidency, a majority in the House, and a conservative slant in the Supreme Court.

Of course, President Donald Trump was elected only by Constitutional arcana via the Electoral College, and he somewhat decisively lost the popular vote. Meanwhile, increasingly, it looks as if Trump’s campaign openly allied with Russia against the national interests of the United States.

In the legislative branch, GOP state organizations have gerrymandered their states’ congressional districts, which allowed the GOP to then gerrymander offensively laughable districts for the US House of Representatives. States that reliably vote blue in presidential elections are found with wildly disproportionate Republican majorities in their congressional delegations.

And in the Republican Senate headed by Mitch McConnell, Republicans effectively stonewalled Obama’s Supreme Court nominee Merrick Garland so that the conservative edge would remain, ultimately, with Trump’s nominee Neil Gorsuch.

But many Republican voters don’t like to be reminded that the Republican government they support is, consequently, entirely illegitimate. Every court case in which Neil Gorsuch’s fifth vote tips the balance is illegitimate. Every executive order Trump signs erasing his legitimately elected predecessor’s legacy is illegitimate. The Obamacare repeal and tax reform laws the GOP Congressional leadership are hastily ramming through are so illegitimate and inappropriate that even the Republican Party has suddenly lost its cohesion to agree on bad policy America does not actually support.

But mention that to a Republican voter, and the concerns will be brushed aside.

“Let’s not talk about political cheating, because as far as I’m concerned, both sides do it,” said local Republican voter Amy Hefflingerz. “Even though, technically, Democrats should have gotten that judge seat, and technically America, collectively, wanted Hillary, Democrats need to get over it because they lost. It doesn’t matter if it wasn’t fair. Life isn’t fair.”

(Picture courtesy of DonkeyHotey.)

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