White Nationalist Poster Boy Peter Cvjetanovic Stunned To Learn His Family Immigrated To America

Charlottesville, VA—

Peter Cvjetanovic’s face recently went viral because of the Charlottesville white supremacy rally that he participated in, which turned violent and ended in the death of one non-Nazi alongside many other injuries.

A viral picture of him chanting some bullshit Nazi rant with the rest of the tiki torch-holding Nazi crowd has turned him into the poster boy for white supremacy, but now he’s upset that the picture went viral and everyone knows he’s a nazi dork. He’s even been nicknamed “Angry Torch Guy.”

Cvjetanovic is a university student studying history and political science, but he’s apparently bad at both because he just recently learned that his family immigrated to America from the Balkans, and therefore has no right to decide who gets to be American and who doesn’t.

“All this time I assumed my family were original Americans who might have signed the Declaration of Independence or rebelled against the tyrannical British king or something, but I was astounded to find out that Cvjetanovic is not a British name,” he said. “Nor does it come from the earliest North American colonists—the French, Spanish, or Dutch. I guess that during all these months I’ve been declaring what American culture is and who doesn’t get to be included inside American society, I have just been talking bullshit. I realize now that by trying to exclude Mexicans, South Americans, Asians, black people, Muslims, Hindus, Buddhists, etc. from America, I have just been picking an arbitrary cutoff point from which immigration to America no longer applies for people trying to come here and make a better life for their children. People like my ancestors, who originally were very much not American. I’m sorry I’ve been such a c***.”

Lolz, he didn’t actually say any of that! But he is really upset that his picture has gone viral, so, like, totally don’t share pictures of his face in all your social media circles because that would just be so mean.

Lolz again! Post his angry Nazi face everywhere so that he finally, actually faces the discrimination he’s been saying white males have faced for years. It’s okay to discriminate against Nazis. The whole world was in agreement back in the 1940s. Cvjetanovic would know if he weren’t such a shitty history student. Send his nazi rally photos to his professors so he fails his history classes. 😀 😀 😀

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