Mike Pence, Who Can See His Political Future Is Sinking With Trump, Spends His Days Writing Musicals


Washington D.C.—

The days are long and boring for Vice President Mike Pence, who President Donald Trump allows little responsibility and decision-making because of egotism, but Pence has found and incubated a new talent while killing time during White House office hours.

Throughout the first year and a quarter of the Trump-Pence presidency, Mr. Pence has reportedly written several, full-length musicals packed with original songs and lyrics.

“Mike has really blossomed artistically, and in the absence of political involvement he has entered into a creative sweet spot,” explained aide to the Vice President’s staff Thomas Ralstone. “He’s cranking out a full-blown musical every two weeks, and I’ve had a couple conversations with him in which he told me he thinks he’s burning out on politics but sees a bright future in the theatre.”

The Halfway Post obtained a photo of the list of some of Pence-produced musicals from a snoopy White House janitor, and the following are the titles of Mr. Pence’s scripted productions:

A Dancer In Another Life

The Secret Kept From God

The Husband’s Guilt

Confused: The Musical

[Working Title:] The Volleyball Scene From Top Gun 2

No Girls Allowed

Short-Shorts Mike

[A comedic monologue] When Did Women Get So Assertive?

If God Can Hear My Thoughts…I’m Screwed! A Comedy

That One Summer In 1975 With Brad Where It Happened

The Impeachment Survivor

So Close, Yet So, So Far

Wives: Who Needs Them? A Farce

Firefighter Pole



(Picture courtesy of Michael Vadon.)

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