Mike Pence, Who Can See His Political Future Is Sinking With Trump, Spends His Days Writing Musicals

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Washington D.C.—

The days are long and boring for Vice President Mike Pence, who President Donald Trump allows little responsibility and decision-making because of egotism, but Pence has found and incubated a new talent while killing time during White House office hours.

Throughout the first year and a quarter of the Trump-Pence presidency, Mr. Pence has reportedly written several, full-length musicals packed with original songs and lyrics.

“Mike has really blossomed artistically, and in the absence of political involvement he has entered into a creative sweet spot,” explained aide to the Vice President’s staff Thomas Ralstone. “He’s cranking out a full-blown musical every two weeks, and I’ve had a couple conversations with him in which he told me he thinks he’s burning out on politics but sees a bright future in the theatre.”

The Halfway Post obtained a photo of the list of some of Pence-produced musicals from a snoopy White House janitor, and the following are the titles of Mr. Pence’s scripted productions:

A Dancer In Another Life

The Secret Kept From God

The Husband’s Guilt

Confused: The Musical

[Working Title:] The Volleyball Scene From Top Gun 2

No Girls Allowed

Short-Shorts Mike

[A comedic monologue] When Did Women Get So Assertive?

If God Can Hear My Thoughts…I’m Screwed! A Comedy

That One Summer In 1975 With Brad Where It Happened

The Impeachment Survivor

So Close, Yet So, So Far

Wives: Who Needs Them? A Farce

Firefighter Pole

 

 

(Picture courtesy of Michael Vadon.)

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