President Macron: Trump Wore Hulk Hands Throughout My White House Visit

French President Emmanuel Macron claimed in a French television interview today that President Donald Trump wore Hulk Smash Hands during his White House visit two weeks ago.

The foam children’s toy has been popular due to the recent Avengers movies, and it appears Mr. Trump is a fan as well.

“It made shaking his hand very awkward, as the toy hands are, essentially, giant green fists,” said Macron. “But the strangest part was that Mr. Trump never acknowledged the fists. When I finally couldn’t resist, and asked him if he was a fan of the Hulk, he looked at them and smiled and said, ‘I don’t understand how the fake news can say I have small hands.’ It was very odd, but even weirder was how accustomed to the gloves his staff seemed to be.”

President Trump has become infamous for his handshakes, and several foreign leaders have admitted to preparing mentally and physically ahead of bilateral meetings for Trump’s vigorous, socially inappropriate handshaking.

“With Trump, you never know what he’s going to do,” said Charles Michel, Prime Minister of Belgium, after meeting with Trump during the President’s recent Europe trip. “I trained for the moment for weeks with my staff, asking them to pretend to be Trump and surprise me with greetings ranging from wild, vigorous handshakes to American football-esque tackles.”

Some commentators on social media suspect the habit comes from Trump’s conspicuous insecurities about the size of his hands. Jokes mocking his hand size have been popular since Spy Magazine referred to Trump as a “Short-Fingered Vulgarian” back in the 80s.

“I must admit, I was surprised by the small size of President Trump’s hands every time I shook them during my first meeting with him shortly after his inauguration,” said Macron. “So perhaps he was trying to compensate the second time around. His hand reminded me of my niece’s hand, and she’s eleven years old. Frankly, I prefer shaking a Hulk glove, though, because at least that way his excessive palm sweat, ice cream stickiness, and smeared orange foundation makeup stays on his fingers and not mine.”

Follow The Halfway Post, America’s #1 source of satirical news, on Facebook here, Twitter here, Tumblr here, or Instagram here for more liberal comedy, political humor and satire! Also, check out our podcast Brain Milk here!

(Photo courtesy of tinyfroglet.)

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s