Scheming Eric Trump Reportedly Convincing His Dad Not To Pardon Donald Jr.


Washington D.C.—

In a case of White House Trump family intrigue, Eric Trump has reportedly been working tirelessly to convince his father, President Donald Trump, not to pardon his brother, Donald Trump Jr.

The move comes amid uncertainty whether Donald Jr. will be prosecuted for apparent Russian collusion during his father’s presidential campaign. The Trump family is using the “We didn’t know” defense, but many commentators have suggested that the intent to sell out America’s democracy is obvious.

An unlikely proponent of the effort to send Donald Jr. to prison, however, is his younger brother Eric.

“Eric’s argument in the internal debate of what to do with Don Jr. has been a little surprising,” said a White House staffer who requested anonymity to speak candidly. “Eric has been telling his father for days now to let Don Jr. take the fall for the administration, and has been developing what appears to be a smear campaign of Don Jr.’s work in the Trump Organization. Eric’s been alleging that Don Jr. is unpopular in the board room, that Don Jr. is lame, and that Junior doesn’t ever give Eric a turn on the X-Box game system they have hooked up in the conference room.”

Another White House staffer reached out to The Halfway Post to explain that the Trump family’s internal politics are beginning to disrupt the Administration’s ability to focus on how to mitigate the political damage of Donald Jr.’s email scandal.

“Jared Kushner has taken Eric’s side in what appears to be an unstable and wobbly temporary alliance,” said an aide who requested to only be identified as a senior adviser. “Jared and Don Jr. have been at odds for years because, while Jared is cooler and managed to obtain the golden boy White House job, Don Jr. is older and has the Trump family birthright. Eric comes in a distant third place in the hierarchy of Trump sons, but this alliance is a shrewd move by Jared who can use Eric’s reinforcing opinion that Don Jr. should take the fall for the family in order to rise above Don Jr. in President Trump’s eyes.”

A third White House staffer suggested that Eric was in over his head allying with Mr. Kushner.

“Short-term, this is a bold move,” said the third staffer. “High risk, but potentially high reward. Eric has had his eye on Don Jr.’s position as chief executive of the Trump company for some time so it makes sense for Eric to try and sabotage his brother. But there’s still the chance that President Trump will ultimately decide to pardon Don Jr., in which case this could backfire spectacularly on Eric. If Eric is upset that Don Jr. doesn’t ever give him a turn to play with the X-Box, just wait until Don Jr. finds out Eric has been conspiring against him and backstabbing him. Eric may never get to play on the X-Box ever again.”

The Trumps themselves have all personally refused to comment on this story.

(Photo courtesy of Disney/ABC Television Group.)

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s