…It’s Obvious Conservatives Aren’t Praying Hard Enough To Stop Mass Shootings

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St. Louis, MO—

Another big mass shooting happened, and it’s such a cliché now that it had trouble climbing to the headlines of digital news.

Who wants to talk about it when so many mass shootings occur that the hip-shooter response from both sides is exasperated cultural resentment?

Once again, conservative gun zealots have shielded themselves with pavlovian worship of the right to potentially rise up in armed-rebellion against the federal government, and refused to accept that individual mass shootings are indicative of a larger societal failing. Conservatives have been moved to pray for the assaulted city, and have played the liberals-are-disrespectful-to-the-victims-and-survivors card in response to passionate liberal pleas calling for America to start legislating guns like all the other industrialized nations in Western Europe.

But the problem is not that Conservatives haven’t picked a solution to gun violence—they have. They picked prayer. They’re always allegedly praying for America.

Buuuut, they very evidently aren’t praying hard enough are they? Maybe they have never truly committed themselves to convincing God to lay off a little with the mass murders. Conservatives are really letting America down by falling so piously short in their prayer game, aren’t they?

So from now on, every mass murder that happens while the conservative movement neglects to responsibly legislate mass murder weapons shall henceforth reflect on conservatives’ prayer abilities. And it’s not like modern evangelicals are monastic in focus like Christians used to be. I suspect few conservatives actually spend all day and night praying for the end of mass shootings. They no doubt waste a lot of free time they could spend praying by watching TV and absorbing themselves in social media. Perhaps, conservatives merely throw in a mass shooting bit only once per brief, casual nightly prayer while they fall asleep.

Whatever conservatives’ routines in mass shooting-related prayers are, it is conspicuously not enough. They should probably begin praying night and day with as few breaks as homeostatically possible. They should, no doubt, quit all their social activities to pray more. Every second their prayers fail to bring about the end of this mass shooting era we find ourselves in is a second longer that God is enabled to murder more innocent people based on conservatism’s gun-political malpractice. Evangelicals better get on this!

But the prayers beg the Christian question of why would God alter his Grand Plan® just because conservatives asked him a lot? That doesn’t show any personal responsibility or moral growth on their part does it? Perhaps we might say that God purposefully allows mass shootings to happen because conservatives blatantly obstruct the sensible gun laws that liberals have proven in studies work. Maybe evangelicals should take a freaking hint.

(Picture courtesy of  James Case.)

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