Donald Trump Says His Obviously Fake Hair Is His Favorite Physical Attribute

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Washington D.C.—

In a playful interview with Fox News, President Donald Trump told his most supportive media network that his favorite physical attribute was his hair.

Interviewer Chris Wallace asked the question in a quick blitz-style interview of short, simple questions. After Trump answered his hair, Wallace stared at the camera for a moment with one eyebrow cocked before moving on.

It is a well known, objective fact that Mr. Trump’s hair is totally fake, and why Mr. Trump is pretending otherwise is anyone’s guess.

The following is the entire blitz interview with Mr. Trump’s answers:

Favorite food: “Steak with ketchup.”

Favorite animal: “Honey badger.”

Favorite physical attribute: “His hair.”

Favorite child: “Ivanka,” he said with a wink.

Favorite book: “The Bible,” though he pronounced it rhyming with “dribble.”

Favorite Bible verse(s): “The Testaments.”

Favorite world leader: “Vlad.”

Biggest regret: “Tie between Eric and Donald Jr.”

Favorite accomplishment: “Ivanka,” he said with another wink.

Favorite hobby: “Tweeting pictures of my poop to enemies every morning.”

Best comedic impression of him: “They’re all terrible, wrong, and fake.”

Favorite childhood memory: “Playing ‘ghosts’ with his dad on Friday nights.”

Biggest fear: “Barron will turn out soft like Eric and Don Jr.”

(Photo courtesy of Gage Skidmore.)

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