Donald Trump Hires New Russian White House Janitor That Looks Exactly Like Vladimir Putin


Washington D.C.—

The White House just hired its latest worker, a new janitor. However, the new hire is a controversial choice for most of the Trump Administration because the janitor is very obviously Russian dictator Vladimir Putin wearing a fake mustache.

“Our new janitor is gonna be so great,” explained President Trump on Twitter, for some reason. “I only get the best people, and this janitor is the best. He’s got great advice, he’ll always be around me helping me solve tough problems, and he’s definitely not Vladimir Putin.”

Trump’s staff was less impressed.

“It makes no sense at all,” explained Trump’s Chief-of-Staff John Kelly. “The mustache does not hide the fact that the janitor is Putin. The president of Russia can’t be going through all our trash because we have some very serious and important documents that we shred and throw away. It’s just a terrible idea for Putin to take over as a janitor.”


(Picture courtesy of TaylorHerring.)

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