President Donald Trump today inspired an unusual controversy during a press conference when, while standing awkwardly behind Mike Pence during the Vice President’s remarks to the press about the coronavirus response, Ivanka Trump walked up to Mr. Trump and handed him a bowl of ice cream.
The bowl had 7 scoops in it: two chocolate, three vanilla, and two strawberry. Trump then slowly ate the ice cream, appearing to savor each spoonful. Each bite he’d close his eyes, and a few times the President audibly moaned.
Mr. Pence repeatedly praised Trump’s executive efforts against the pandemic’s spread, and even looked behind him to gesture with his hands at Trump. Pence appeared entirely unfazed by seeing the President with a bowl of ice cream, and at one moment gestured to Trump that he had dripped some ice cream onto his chin.
Trump interrupted Pence a few times, once to tell White House staffers standing in the back of the conference room “don’t give any ice cream to the evil press,” a second time to tell Ivanka she forgot the whipped cream on top, and a third time to ask Dr. Anthony Fauci if he thought it’d be hot if Ivanka came back wearing nothing but a whipped cream bikini.
After finishing his scoops, he lifted the bowl to his mouth and began to vigorously lick it clean.
When it was Trump’s turn to talk, he handed the bowl to Pence, who stood behind the President dutifully holding it for the remainder of the press conference in which Trump ranted for half an hour about how he thought it was very suspicious no one has ever seen the coronavirus and Michigan Governor Gretchen Whitmer’s period blood in the same room.
More from The Halfway Post vault:
Follow The Halfway Post, America’s #1 source of satirical news, on Facebook here, Twitter here, Tumblr here, or Instagram here for more liberal comedy, political humor and satire! Also, check out our podcast Brain Milk here!