Rudy Giuliani Told A Judge The Election Was On “Opposite Day” So Trump Won

(Picture courtesy of Gage Skidmore.)

Washington D.C.—

President Donald Trump’s legal team, led by former-mayor Rudy Giuliani, has lost a series of court cases attempting to overturn the election Joe Biden quite clearly won.

Mr. Giuliani’s latest legal maneuver, however, made the federal judge presiding over the proceedings literally laugh out loud in the courtroom.

“Rudy claimed that the date of the election, Tuesday, November 3rd, was actually ‘Opposite Day,’ so that, because Joe Biden won the most electoral votes that day, Trump was the real winner,” explained Halfway Post reporter Kirk Stiggitz, who witnessed the proceedings. “The judge audibly laughed, and then asked Rudy if he had prepared any legal arguments with logic more advanced than grade school. Rudy then asked the judge if he could talk a little slower because he was being paid $20,000 a day by the Trump campaign to keep the trials going as long as possible. Rudy then launched into a half hour argument in which he suggested the Constitution does not specifically protect registered Democrats’ right to vote, and had his hand in his pants the whole time while occasionally complaining how his shirts never stay tucked in.”

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