Donald Trump To Start Diet, Limit Himself To Only 12 Big Macs Per Day, 6 Diet Cokes Per Hour

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St. Louis, MO

JK, slight exaggeration—but, if conservatives mocked President Obama for eating arugula and dijon mustard, we get to mock Donald Trump for much more egregious crimes against digestion.

Trump’s eating habits are so astonishingly unhealthy that it’s a wonder he’s still alive.

Time Magazine should have nominated Trump’s sisyphean kidneys as Person of the Year. At what point do President Trump’s clogged arteries become a national security threat?

(Photo courtesy of Gage Skidmore.)

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