Evangelicals Are Furious “Mormon Mitt” Is Actually Taking Serious His Oath Of Office To God

Washington D.C.—

The following are quotes from Evangelical Trump supporters who are furious Mitt Romney voted for removing Trump from office:

“This is why we don’t consider Mormons to be real Christians! A real Christian would know Trump is doing God’s work, even if none of the means to which he makes progress toward those ends are anything even remotely resembling Christian values and morals! The less Trump acts like Jesus, the more I’m convinced he’s doing exactly what Jesus would have wanted!” -Keith Warbles, 49

“Mitt is a Mormon they say, but more like a total MORON! Everyone knows the oath that Senators recited to God on a Bible in order to faithfully and truthfully judge the impeachment of Trump was only a formality. Just because Democrats proved Trump committed impeachable crimes doesn’t mean any Republicans should actually approve the articles of impeachment! Does Mitt Romney know anything about how politics works?!” -Sally Piedmont, 37

“Mitt should just change his name to Nancy Pelosi’s Bitch. He may have been a Republican his whole life and still share every conservative viewpoint, but this vote against Trump erases all of that! From now on, everyone should know Mitt Romney is a libtard Democrat communist who is further left than a baby Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez had with Stalin that then grew up and married a 150-years-old Bernie Sanders and then cheated on Bernie by taking a swingers’ cruise to Vietnam, doing a shore excursion to the jungle, digging up Ho Chi Minh’s corpse, and having gay necrophiliac butt sex with it!” -Charles Ross, 61

“God doesn’t care about your oath, Mitt! God cares about you keeping Trump in office long enough to promote Israel so that Jesus can come back and cast all the Jews, Muslims, Mormons, and libtards into Hell!” -Karen McPoyle, 46

“Hey, Mitt! Stop being such a boy scout! Just take your Russian bribe, shut up, and vote to acquit Trump like you were told!” -Lindsey Graham, 64

“Romney needs to stop making real Christians look bad! He’s going on and on about his sacred oath to God… give me a break! This is why nobody likes Mormons: they’re actually morally upstanding. Born-again Evangelicals are way better because there’s no limit to how many times you can be born again! You can sin, lie, and commit blasphemies against your promises to God all you want when you can just get born again. It’s the perfect free pass to do whatever you want! Mormons should try it out!”

Follow The Halfway Post, America’s #1 source of satirical news, on Facebook at https://www.facebook.com/thehalfwaypost, Tumblr at https://halfwaypost.tumblr.com, or Instagram @thehalfwaypost for more liberal, political humor and satire!

(Picture courtesy of Gage Skidmore.)

One thought

  1. Mitt Romney is a true man of God who don’t go around worshipping Trump the evangelical chosen one when wrong is wrong you stand up to it

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.